For the first six weeks after Birch was born I knew I needed to give myself grace in all ways. I put no pressure on myself to work on the blog, no pressure to exercise unless I felt the urge, and certainly no pressure for expedited postpartum weight loss. My goal was just to do what felt good movement wise, to care for my baby, and to eat whatever I desired in the moment.
Exercise has always come easy to me.
I crave a good sweat, and I found myself walking with other new mom friends and eventually doing some light workouts and jogging by the end of the six weeks. I couldn’t wait to do more when I was cleared by my doctor.
On the other hand, eating mindfully has always been a bigger challenge.
As I have said before, it’s easier to add than subtract, so adding exercise was easier to me than subtracting delicious food. During those first six weeks, I wasn’t trying to subtract food. I ate 100% intuitively. I ate by my heart’s desires and by my hunger cues. Our sweet friends brought us meals that were very much appreciated. With those meals came whole pans of brownies, not one but TWO pies during one week, home-baked cookies, and more. Because my hunger levels were super high from sleep deprivation and breastfeeding, I enjoyed them all. Thomas and I finished BOTH of those pies within the week! I ate pie for breakfast dessert, lunch dessert, and dinner dessert 🙂
Eventually, though, I got a little tired of eating so many sweets (because they really don’t make you feel that great, amiright?) I started to crave nutrient-dense meals again – soups, salads, all the Roots bowls. After the six week mark, which coincided with Thanksgiving, I’d cut back on the sugar and settle into a normal healthy eating pattern again.
I want to get back to the healthiest version of my body which does postpartum weight loss.
Obviously I don’t have any grand plans for a diet, cutting out food groups (even sugar), or extreme weight loss. That has never been me – life needs to be enjoyed! But I do want to get back to the place where I feel confident in my clothes and I think it’s important to acknowledge that. I love my body now, and I loved my body at 9+ months pregnant. Wanting to lose some weight doesn’t mean I don’t love my body. It also doesn’t mean I’m throwing intuitive or mindful eating out the window. It simply means I have intention to change my habits and tweak my diet in the direction towards a healthier me, more squiggle downs than ups.
I feel like it’s hard to talk about weight loss online now without people thinking you aren’t accepting your body as it is. But the truth is, it’s OK to want to change your body composition as long as you are doing it in a healthy, slow and steady, still-enjoying-your-life and respecting your body kinda way.
There is no one size fits all for postpartum weight loss
There isn’t one right way to parent, to manage your work flow, or to fold laundry. Nor is there a one-size-fits-all exercise regime. Everyone has to ‘know thyself’ and do what feels best for them. Similarly, there isn’t one formula for losing weight. The free spirits and the data nerds aren’t going to be happy with the same techniques. For some counting calories or food journaling sounds like an exhausting, restricting chore, and for others it’s a fun way to organize the day and the mind.
I know that I need some form of accountability. It seems that there is now a stigma against using any kind of tool other than intuitive eating to lose weight. I believe you can use a combination of intuitive eating and food journaling and/or calorie/point/macro counting and lose weight in an emotionally healthy way.
I am almost afraid to tell you that I’ve been tracking my meals in My Fitness Pal for a few weeks. But in the spirit of transparency and vulnerability, I want to share. I have been keeping a log to encourage that connection between what I’m putting in my mouth and its nutrient and energy density. For me and my personality, this technique really helps me be mindful of mindless snacking and consumption of empty calories. As I said above, I’m not on some hard-limit diet, and while I’ve been loosely journaling I’ve eaten donuts and pizza and wine and french fries plus lots of kale salads and veggies and oatmeal and superfoods. As much as I know about nutrition, it is really eye opening to reflect on the composition of food. It is that pause, that reflection, that is ultimately why food journaling is always a successful tool for me.
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
After some time of eating unhealthy food, our bodies naturally crave healthy stuff. 🙂 At least, that’s the way it is with me! You’re doing such a great job of eating well, Kath. 🙂
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
Shana says
I think you raise an interesting point: can there be a happy marriage between monitoring diet and intuitive eating? An purist in either camp would say no, but I wonder if there is a sweet spot in the middle. One where we can use data and information to inform our choices, but not develop into disordered eating. Where we can talk about the cool things nutrients do, but not obsess about them. Where we can do challenging workouts without the goal to burn calories or lose weight, simply for the adrenaline rush of a tough workout. Where we can walk and do yoga and know that is enough. Where we can stop spending SO much time thinking about food and exercise but not eliminating the process completely. I think where we get in trouble in life (as is usually the case) when we let the pendulum swing too far in either direction. There is no ONE way that fits for everyone. It’s usually a combination of philosophies and methods that fit our lives. Much more meaningful is the time we spend reflecting on these things and choosing things that truly make us feel good from the inside out. And that’s the hardest part. Learning to listen to ourselves and not the constant, external noise.
KathEats says
TOTALLY agree with you
Jill says
Tracking my food is the only reliable way I’ve found for me to be truly aware of my eating habits. I’m terrible at estimating what I’ve actually eaten in a day if I don’t take notes on it. I find that being very honest with myself about my eating has helped immensely, and I can see days when I’ve eaten more than I need because of emotions or lack of planning – it’s really useful and I find the tracking to be sustainable.
Lauren says
I love this. You have such a healthy attitude toward eating and exercise–very inspiring. Thank you for being brave and open, as always.
Andrea says
I totally agree that some accountability can help! I was tracking food in my fitnes pal for a little while and it really did help me learn more about my meals and calorie intake. I learned I should try to incorporate protein earlier in the day, for example – something I couldn’t really have eyeballed!
Katherine Bisinger says
I’m still working on getting in shape and lose the last few pounds after baby #2. I’ve used myfitnesspal off and on for years. I’ve also done the whole30 a couple of times and changed my eating to 85% paleo which makes me feel good but it doesn’t help me get a handle on portion size and snacking like tracking calories does.
Kelli H says
I believe every body is different. You should do what makes you feel the best. I’m the same way in that if I have too many sweets I start to feel terrible. I’ve learned that sugar, alcohol, and dairy really don’t make me feel my best. I try to limit all three of those as much as possible while still enjoying life. As for exercise I’m still surprised by how early on you were able to incorporate it back into your routine but good for you, seriously. It took me a long time after baby number 1 to feel like working out. Again, every body is different so I respect that you’re listening to yours. Thank you for being transparent and sharing your journey.
Colleen says
I give you credit for sharing your life, including this “hot topic” about weight loss, on the internet. I’m sure some people will make rude/unhelpful comments, but really I think what it comes down to is we each need to do what is best for our personal situation. As a Psychology nut, I love that you mentioned personality type, because it totally plays a role in what techniques are going to work for one person and not another. I think it sounds like you have a healthy attitude towards food, and only you know your body. Go, Kath! 🙂
Karen says
“…there is now a stigma against using any kind of tool other than intuitive eating to lose weight…”
So true – but people also need to acknowledge this doesn’t work for everyone. I have medication that helps me breath but also causes an increase in appetite. If I only eat what my body tells me too and follow it’s cues I would eat too much because of this side effect of the necessary medication. Tracking what I eat helps me see what I have eaten to manage weight much better than intuitive eating. There should be no stigma in doing what works for you.
alan says
Thank you for the honest post today, Kath. One of the things that has happened is that there is an unofficial but loud police force who call out those who talk about weight loss and try to shame them, and I reject that. I think there is often an unhealthy obsession with weight societally and getting to look like those anorexic waifs often featured in the magazines is clearly unrealistic and unhealthy. But talking about losing pregnancy weight (male or female lol) isn’t unhealthy or offensive at all.
I stopped weighing myself about 3 years ago when I became distressed with the number, so now I go with “how do my clothes fit” (which alas don’t and i’ve been on a years long quest to try to drop some inches unsuccessfully…middle aged man syndrome here). Excess weight is a problem–it leads to more diabetes, more back/knee/hip/foot and ankle pain(arthritis). It is associated with coronary artery disease, which is also associated with diabetes. I don’t know what “healthy weight” is, but having the discussion shouldn’t be the shame that some are making it to be. Good luck with the continued diet, exercise, and fitness, and hope Birch and the other males in the house continue to do well.
KathEats says
Thank you for your male perspective!
Elena Kornis says
I love this post! I feel like it has become somewhat taboo to openly talk about wanting to lose weight and I love to way you address it! Making the choice to lose weight doesn’t always mean you dislike yourself or are trying to conform to crazy societal expectations. Sometimes it means you are honestly listening to your body telling you what it needs so you can feel your best! Thank you for promoting this point on your blog.
Chelsey says
I love this! As a registered dietitian, physician assistant and mom currently expecting baby #2, I couldn’t agree more with this post. Granting thyself grace immediately following delivery of a baby is so important. I love that you are taking a rationale, realistic and flexible approach towards your goals instead of unnecessarily beating yourself up! Go you!
Christin J Slyngman says
Yes, so much truth! I completely agree every person is different and you have to find what works for you. They say that for losing weight it’s 80% what you eat, and 20% exercise. For me, even though I was eating a healthy diet postpartum, because I have always been an active person, I really didn’t see baby weight come off until I started exercising again regularly. I think that had to do with regaining strength in my muscles and getting them used to being USED at the same level again. I don’t track calories, I eat more intuitively, and I make lots of “mistakes” but I just try to eat healthier the next meal or snack. It took a while for me to become a healthy intuitive eater, but it has been worth it for me. I say the most important thing is taking the time to figure out what works best for you, and then having patience with the process. That way it’s not even about loving your body or not, it’s about embracing the journey you are on.
Aileen says
Do you try to stay within certain percentages (or grams) of Carbs, Protein, and Fat a day? MFP has that feature and I’m never sure what to aim for. I’m curious to know what ratios you use. Also curious how you balance squiggly lines down and breastfeeding (as a fellow breastfeeding mom).Thanks!
KathEats says
I don’t pay attention to macros, but I do try to eat protein carbs and fat at every meal and snack in relatively equal portions, or maybe 50 25 25 with carbs being the highest. As for the squiggles, as I said I am very loosely tracking so some days I don’t meet my calories and some days I go over and I just know it will come out in the wash aka squiggly line.
Leah says
Thank you for sharing that you are tracking to lose weight! I’m nearly 2 years postpartum and still have 10 pounds to lose. When I read about people who just lose the weight without actually doing anything, I feel like there is something wrong with me! I just weaned from breastfeeding, and am hoping that leveled out hormones help me take off this last 10! While I’ve never loved my body more, I also want to feel me healthiest and best!
Ellie says
I use my fitness pal from time to time also as a dietitian. I’m running a half and have needed to monitor my calories as I either forget to eat enough or eat too much.
I sometimes think our world has gotten too judgmental over these things. Aren’t we just trying to figure out what works best for us/our patients… There is no “right” answer.
Emily J says
Thanks, Kath. Good points. I appreciate your transparency!
Allyson Balzuweit says
Great post, Kath. I use MyFitnessPal or some other type of tracking system with most of my clients in my private practice. Most people aren’t in tune with the big picture of their eating habits, and using a tool is both helpful to increase awareness for the individual, but also for me as a clinician to get a glimpse of what’s going on to target areas of change that will be the most effective initially. I do love your approach to intuitive eating and appreciate your transparency and authenticity. I too, am an advocate for eating real food and not promoting trendy fad diets.
Kim F. says
Thank you so much for posting this. I”m currently pregnant with my first (due in 7 weeks!!!) – and due to complications, I was restricted from working out other than walking or light weight lifting. I went from racing triathlons and half marathons to what felt like very little exercise. I am SO ready to move my body again, and the motivation isn’t just to lose weight – it is to simply move and feel better and I know that the weight loss will come with that. I know that the first 6 weeks will be my grace period (especially with my first – HOLY LIFE CHANGE), but as soon as I’m cleared to exercise, I know that getting back to my old “Self” will be important. Not only for my health, but my mental state as well. Also, tracking what I eat will definitely be a part of that, getting my portion sizes back under control (and still being able to breastfeed) will be a huge part of this learning curve that is about to happen. So, after that whole novel – thank you for making me feel okay about being ready to work out again, and to track my eating habits, and to want to feel like myself. I haven’t felt like it was okay to want that until now.
KathEats says
<3
Kelly says
I’ve always appreciated your approach to nutrition and fitness not only because it’s very similar to my own, but because you are so honest, open and real about it. I had a baby in July and our journeys have been similar. I got a lot of “you had a baby, eat whatever you want” in the early days, but like you said, you start to feel blah and you need a ton of energy to properly care for an infant/toddler/child all day (and you have two!) Working out is my time to take care of myself and eating in moderation goes hand and hand with that. After struggling with an eating disorder earlier in life, I’m now much more appreciative of my body (especially after childbirth, right?!) and while I don’t count calories or track anymore because of that history, I say we all gotta do what works for us and cut the shaming and judgement. Thanks for your intelligent and thoughtful post. Being body positive is honoring that we all have powerful intuition and understanding when it comes to how our bodies work, and there is no one size fits all.
Jocelyn says
Thank you for posting this! I admire your transparency and for keeping it real. I have always admired your attitude/opinions towards lifestyle, exercise, weight loss and food. For many years I was caught in an unhealthy binge/starve cycle which I think lots of men and women unfortunately are due to many reasons – societal pressures being one of them. For me – keeping a food journal has been a great and healthy way to keep everything organized and keeps me looking forward to each and every day. It has been an important part of my recovery – not just the one i keep online but for almost a year I planned and prepped just by writing out my meals.
Onward and upwards!
Shoshan says
I couldn’t agree more. I think people are really focused on one way only for “healthy” living but in reality there are differnt things that work for different people. Stay true to you!
Louise RD says
I can’t believe how similar our attitudes toward health & fitness are- I, too, jump onto MFP for periodic tracking. There’s only one major difference: my all-time favorite vegetable —> ONIONS! As a joke, my hubby actually gift-wrapped one for my birthday- and I peeled, cooked, and ate the whole thing! LOL
KathEats says
Hahaha!!
Mary says
This is such a great approach! It’s so important to highlight that it’s all about what YOU want to do, and I think that’s the best stride we’re starting to make as women. People are starting to realize “wait a minute…I don’t have to look like a Crossfit athlete if I don’t want to…”. Unless you do want to look like a Crossfit athlete! Rock on. Health comes in lots of different shapes and sizes and body compositions, and as long as you’re truly doing what YOU feel is best for your own body, you really can’t go wrong. It is so hard to ignore all of the messaging around us, but when we can objectively decide what is best for us, that’s when true “health” happens.
I have no problem with tracking food, as long as we can relax around the numbers by using common sense (assuming the “numbers” are realistic. Like, not 800 cals a day.). If you’re still hungry after you’ve hit whatever goal, I think it’s important to be able to say “Hmm…I didn’t get good sleep last night” or “I did an extra-hard workout today” or “I walked more today than usual”, or “I feel very stressed, and that’s putting strain on my body”. And know that a number doesn’t dictate your hunger, and it’s okay to eat more if your body is telling you to. I don’t believe in ignoring hunger. On the flip side, tracking can be really helpful if you aren’t that hungry, too! You can objectively know that your body needs a certain amount of calories to function, and eat that amount out of self-care. This is particularly helpful to me during bouts of anxiety, when my appetite disappears without a trace lol.
Great post, Kath!
KathEats says
Yes and yes!!
Sarah says
I completely agree that different things work for different people. I hate the word “diet” but also don’t find the attitude that just eating whatever you want, whenever you want is a strategy that will work for many of us! I know people in bigger bodies (according to weight charts, clothing sizes etc) who are very active, healthy, and happy. I also know that I feel uncomfortable in my own body if I go beyond a certain weight/size (and it’s not about the specific number). I just feel heavy, less energetic and less happy. I have a sweet tooth and love baking. However, when I am in a pattern of eating a lot of sugar and carbs then I don’t feel good so I do restrict those items and substitute with fruits, veggies, nuts etc. I don’t eliminate but I try to be much more thoughtful about what and when I’m eating. In doing so I can gradually get myself back on track and feeling better.
Sam @ G&G Nutrition Co. says
Hi Kath! Thank you so much for talking about postpartum nutrition. This can be such a stressful time in women’s lives, and I love how you have a balanced approached that’s centered around taking care of yourself – and more importantly, an individualized approach. One thing I would say to some of the comments on this post is that intuitive eating is way more than just listening to your hunger or fullness. Gentle nutrition and making mindful food decisions is another piece of it, and that often gets buried in the Instagram posts about pizza and donuts 🙂 I think the most important thing is not the action (like tracking), but rather the intention behind it. I love how you shared that tracking does not always have to come from a place of deprivation, food obsession, restriction, etc. I completely agree with you that people love learning about foods and seeing exactly what they are made of. More power to you if that is your jam!
KathEats says
Great point!
Mary says
YES. The term “intuitive eating” gets thrown around a lot by people who have neither read the book, nor fully embraced the lifestyle that it is. That book helps you understand the way we eat on a scientific, emotional, and physical level, and the work goes far beyond any diet. It is deeply emotional work that can be soooooo scary at times (like embracing that your body might be happier and functioning better at a higher weight than you thought was ideal. In my case, gaining 10 pounds even when I was not underweight to begin with actually regulated my hormones and made me feel better than ever. But I had to get away from the scale and listen to my body in order to realize that). IE puts you back in touch with skills that go with you anywhere: on any vacation, through any tough time emotionally, through any holiday, any stressor, ANY season. Not everybody is interested in doing that kind of deep work though, and that’s okay! But reducing Intuitive Eating down to literally one of ten principles does a disservice to the women who wrote that awesome book, and everyone who has benefitted from it.
Meghan says
This post was so perfectly stated! Enjoyed reading it!
Leigh Anne says
Long time reader but I’ve never commented before and I just want to say – thank you. I am 9 months postpartum with my third daughter and struggling to lose weight. I was “doing” Keto and just don’t feel great on it anymore and I have this weird feeling like I failed because I just want to eat more fruits and veggies along with pizza night when it happens without having to make some wackadoo pizza crust for me! So thank you, this post is so well written and very very much appreciated. As a very novice blogger I can only dream of writing posts like this. Thank you and good luck on your journey!!!
KathEats says
Girl I want you to eat pizza as much as you do! I think the Keto diet is crazy restrictive and I don’t think I could do it for one day. Fruit and pizza are just too good. You only live once and you have to enjoy life!
Leigh Anne says
Agreed!
Bree says
You’ve got to do what works for you! We’re different. 🙂 In fact, after years of on again/off again (and at times problematic) use of MFP, I finally deleted it from my phone this month in favor of paper tracking my meal. I love my planner and being intentional with my food choices, but I also really needed to remove the focus from numbers for my own well-being. It’s a fantastic tool, I still recommend it to people, but it’s not for me right now.
Also, I agree that you can love your body at many stages, but still want to change it. 🙂
Megan says
Hi Kath, I’m SO GLAD you shared this. As a dietitian who also struggles with what to share when wanting to lose some weight, I completely understand how you feel. I find tracking calories, as long as I don’t become too obsessed, to be so helpful in being more mindful. Basically thank you for posting this.
KathEats says
🙂
LaurenG says
Yes! This is why you’re so relatable. It would be great to be a naturally thin person and not have to track calories. But for the rest of us average people who want to stay at a normal weight, it’s unfortunately necessary. It’s so nice to see someone who loves their “normal” body and doesn’t strive to be a size 6.
Vicki says
Love this post and Love your honesty.
I’ve gained Weight over the past year and intuitive eating wasnt shifting it. I started MFP at the end of November and have lost 13 lbs.
Like you, it really helps me to be mindful.
Caitlin says
I lost 25lb with My Fitness Pal a few years ago! Had twin girls in July and gained 55 lb during my pregnancy (maybe more… I didn’t step on the scale those last few weeks!) I’m back down to 8-9 lb above my pre-pregnancy weight and back on My Fitness Pal to try to lose it. I have no shame in tracking my calories. Do what works for you. If I don’t write it down, I don’t think enough about what I’m putting in my body. My problem this time around has been “giving up” towards the end of the day because I’m tired or don’t have a healthy dinner adequately prepped. But I do realize I should give myself grace with 6 month old twins. The weight will come off eventually. Where there is a will, there is a way!
Ttrockwood says
As always your honesty and level headed approach is appreciated- I can’t deal with one more extreme diet propaganda post about eating exclusively fats or how fasting for 16hrs at a time is The Answer.
I have used food journaling in the past and found that for myself I can’t do it diligently daily without becoming too involved, but if i track two days a week or so that gives me a good idea of what’s really happening and let’s me adjust accordingly in between.
I’ve actually read that on days I’m extra hungry it’s likely due to a calorie deficit from the previous day or even the past several days added up, not necessarily due to activity from that same day of extra hungry. This taught me to really listen more to my body, and give it the extra nutrition it asks for. When I’m eating lots of veggies and feeling great and energetic I have so much more life energy to tackle whatever mental or physical challenges are next
Robin says
Sounds like good old common sense to me. Why let it get out of hand. Taking care of yourself is such a smart thing to do especially with those boys to care for.
Kelli @ Hungry Hobby says
I feel the exact same way! In the RD community there is a huge push toward loving your body as is. The truth is you can love our bodies and want to change them. I’ve been tracking too, loosely but still tracking. I’m also following intuitive eating, I don’t not eat because the numbers say so I follow my hunger. You can have balance in weight loss and I think it’s our job (postpartum blogging dietitians lol) to demonstrate that!