The Need for Community
A few weeks ago, on the most gorgeous warm sunny day we’d had yet this spring, I texted a few of my friends to see if they wanted to meet up at King Family Vineyards in the afternoon. To my surprise, everyone was free.
It was incredible to see our children play together.
(Which they did happily for a good hour without really needing us for anything!)
While these three have gotten to see each other a few times this past year (and two of them go to the same school) they haven’t really gotten to PLAY. Rough and tumble, run-through-the-grass adventure play.
We have definitely gotten outside on adventures as a family unit, but as we all know, it’s much more fun if you have a friend your own age to laugh with.
Some of the same bunch at King Family for their first birthday!
The last time I was a toddler parent I had a wonderful community
Since the pandemic began, we have done very few playdates with friends for either of our kids out of an abundance of caution.
When I was having a down day this winter, I was telling Thomas how when Mazen was 2, I used to have so much fun with the other moms of toddlers. We’d meet at the gym in the morning, meet up at our houses or playgrounds in the afternoon, or take the kids on a day trip somewhere. I told Thomas how much I missed the community, conversation, and support that came from being surrounded by friends in the same parenting stage as I was.
With a bunch of friends at the same vineyard with baby Mazen!
The worst of both worlds
Also recently my friend Hillary (who also has a toddler) shared this TikTok video and it really struck home for me.
Emily says:
“This past year of pandemic parenting has truly been the worst of both worlds. The worst parts of parenting: Being bored and stuck at home, not having resources, not having community, not having support, have been amplified. And the best parts: Watching your kid explore the world, watching their joy and have it be your joy as they explore the world, have been completely absent.
If you became a parent in this past year, this is not what parenting is like.”
I cannot wait for more days like this as we come out of this pandemic hole. The two friends I was with are fully vaccinated, and I am almost out of the two week wait after my second dose. The weight lifted off our shoulders feels incredible.
Whitney W.R. says
Thank you for sharing this. I became a parent for the first time in February of 2020. It has been a very isolating and I look forward to building that community around me very soon!
Kath Younger says
I hope there are many playdates in your future!
Sara says
Congratulations to you on the (almost!) 2 week mark! I am so happy to see you and others able to safely gather again.
I’m getting lunch with one of my best friends this weekend at a restaurant outside and am so excited! Like you, we’ve done limited outdoor play dates and social outings with friends this past year out of an abundance of caution and it’s exciting to think about actually making plans again now that we’re vaccinated.
Kath Younger says
Yes! I get giddy about having a small group of vax friends over to the porch!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
Cutest pictures! 🙂
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
E says
What a tough year for parents of newborns and young children. Everyone deserves a huge crown for making it through this far (including those who missed out on spending time with their grandchild/niece/nephew etc). So glad you could hang out with friends in person on a beautiful day!
ellie says
I think Emily must be the speaker in the TikTok you shared, but for a minute, I thought it was Emily from Daily Garnish — I’ve been reading so long, I remember when y’all used to run together in Charlotte! Talk about a blast from the past; I hope y’all are still friends!
So happy that you’re almost fully vaxxed, and I hope that you and Thomas have a great night away!
Sarah says
I have a 2-year-old and I agree it’s been difficult not being able to share his growth with our family and friends. But honestly the early lock down was a blessing for me. I didn’t have a good maternity leave due to PPD so the lockdown was essentially a “redo” for me. I loved being home to watch him learn to walk and still get to enjoy the fulfillment of work. We are very outdoorsy and so he’s been able to enjoy lots of adventures with me and my husband this past year. We are definitely ready to get back to childcare and office routines now that he’s older and needs more stimulation, but I truly feel we’ve made the very best of this last year. I feel very grateful to have been in the position to work from home and experience my baby’s milestones into toddlerhood.
Kath Younger says
That is a very good way to look at it! It has actually been kind of timely because when you have a young child who naps in the middle of the day, it’s not like you can 1) spend all day out anyways or 2) travel all over the world with or without them. So things like travel being shut down or not being able to do long days out with the kids were kind of a moot point for us too.