Here we are at 10 months old!
Birch is nursing four times a day:
- First thing in the morning (his favorite)
- After morning nap around 11/12
- After afternoon nap around 4 (his second favorite)
- At bedtime (his least favorite)
New Freedom To Leave
Lately being able to go from 6:30am to noon-ish without nursing has given me a new urge to get out of the house in the mornings without a worry about Birch taking (or not taking) a bottle or me needing to pump. We have a new babysitter who will be coming a few mornings a week, and being able to work in a coffee shop or go to a workout class is a joy I didn’t know I was missing until I did it one day! I really haven’t left the house much these past 10 months and there’s a big world out there
Nursing These Days
Birch honestly doesn’t seem all that interested in nursing, and at times I’ve wondered if he might self wean earlier than a year. He doesn’t pull on my shirt or face plant onto my chest. He’s a great solid-food eater so I’ve wondered if he’s just not all that hungry/thirsty (even though I always offer it to him after a nap). There have been times when I really want him to nurse and he simply won’t and pushes me away! (Sob!) But there are still days when he likes to run his little fingers through my hair and smile up at me while he gulps, so I don’t think we’re done quite yet.
I’m Only Nursing On One Side
I’ve always had a good side and a bad side. Because so much of breastfeeding is a feedback system based on supply and demand, I have knowingly perpetuated this imbalance by favoring the good side for the past few months. When Birch was younger, I made more of an effort to start him on both sides equally, but now that he’s older I’ve decided to simplify and just stick to the one good side. This has actually been nice because I no longer have to wear breast pads all the time to catch the let down on the good side while he nurses on the other. That’s a small change but a significant one : )
Trip To Cali
I have a trip planned to California with Beautycounter the week before Birch turns one. I’m so excited to be able to recharge after this wild first year. I do have some frozen milk in the freezer that we will be able to use up, but I also really don’t think he’ll miss it that much. (Hopefully he misses me though – I am going to miss him like crazy since we haven’t been apart for more than a few hours his whole life!)
I hope to continue morning + night nursing when I return from California so I’ll be pumping just a little while I’m there to try to keep the plumbing going. And if my boobs decide to turn off and there’s nothing left when I return, that’s OK since Birch will be one and able to wean.
My plan is to test out dropping one or both of the daytime feeds the week before I leave. I’m going to take my pump with me and pump just a little morning and night (and comfort in between if needed). In an effort to be minimal and not haul tons of storage bags, worry about a freezer in my room, coolers at the airport, etc. I’m not planning to bring any milk home with me. Since he’ll be old enough to switch to whole milk when I return, we don’t have much of a need for frozen milk. I thought about donating it on the West Coast, but I honestly don’t think it’s going to be that much (and I’m sure some of it will contain wine!)
Weaning
I don’t have a true end goal in mind. If Birch wants to keep nursing first thing in the morning for the next six months I’d be fine with that. As long as it’s a want not a need it takes the pressure off. I started weaning Mazen at one year and we continued with just mornings until he was 14 months. I stopped offering it one day when I felt done, and he only asked for it once after that. What’s great about first thing in the morning is you can wear normal bras, normal clothes, leave, go on date nights, etc. but can still keep the sweetness and some immune benefit going from the morning session alone.
Bittersweet
Breastfeeding is hard for so many little tiny reasons but I’m so thankful I was able to experience it twice. I think it’s been a little harder for me this second time around because there is more going on in general with two kids. It is truly the best and hardest thing about the first year for me – more than the sleep the first 6 months I think. Weaning is so bittersweet. I will be happy to be done, to get my boobs back to their normal size and to fit my chest back into my wardrobe. To know that my baby is able to be in the good care of his dad or grandparents or caregivers without needing me to plan ahead or rush back.
But that oxytocin is stroooooong and I have loved being able to nurse both of my boys.
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
Glad you had a good experience with breastfeeding! Thanks for sharing, Kath. 🙂
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
Megan says
Gosh, Kath this sounds like it came directly from my own brain! My son was premature but born around the same time as Birch so we’re in the same stage. Would you mind sharing your thoughts on cow’s milk? I’m torn because I know the benefits, but I also don’t love making a ton of dairy his main source of fat/protein. How much whole milk do you think you’ll end up serving B each day? (FTM, transitions sometimes feel a little overwhelming!)
KathEats says
I’ll probably offer a cup a day (that is the recommendation). They will get fat and protein from other foods too, so I wouldn’t say it’s the MAIN source of fat/protein. Just one of many and a good source of their calcium and vitamin nD.
Kelli says
I have a mid October 2018 baby so I am right there with you! We are slowly cutting down on nursing and I think my little one will also not miss it too much.
Can you explain what you mean about not getting out much the last 10 months? Is that because of not liking to nurse in public! I have to say, I have been jealous of some of the great vacations you have taken, and lots of fun date nights with yummy food! I was surprised to see you write that you haven’t been out as I would have loved to do half of all you have done! You must be a real social butterfly! 🙂
KathEats says
I mean more day to day! I’ve gone 2-3 days without leaving my house during the week except for maybe a stroller run or driving Mazen to and from camp. Birch’s naps have kept us from doing a lot of daytime activities. I definitely live it up on the weekends!
Amy says
Thank you for sharing this! My own little one is 7 months and still breast feeding. So many mixed emotions of wanting part of me back but loving the special bond.
Steph says
When my third and last child self-weaned earlier than I was ready (a little over a year), it was very bittersweet. I loved the snuggle time and the feeling of being a Super Mom who contributed in such a crucial way to his well-being and health that first year. BUT…it also was a bit easier that he wasn’t that interested in breastfeeding anymore. The most important thing is that you know these days are numbered, so you can treasure them all the more!!
Sarah says
Do you think you’ll try to have any more babes? ()
KathEats says
I think I’m done 🙂
Jamie says
Hahaha! I was hoping someone would ask this:)
Ellen says
I totally agree that when it switches from a need to a want, the pressure is off and it’s just a joy. I struggled in the early days, but am glad it worked out over time.
Stacey says
I had one child who nursed a ton throughout her first year and one who (partly because of supply issues) was really uninterested in nursing much when he was about Birch’s age… it’s so hard to tell what each baby is going to do. 🙂 For my son who wasn’t nursing much, I was always so worried about whether he was getting enough hydration and we supplemented with formula until he turned 1… is that something that you worry about too?
KathEats says
He eats well, drinks a lot of water from a sippy and has gained proper weight, so I’m not worried about it. I asked his doctor at his 9 month appt and she wasn’t either.
Wendy says
I find this so interesting! My son was so different then Birch. He only really got into solids after he turned one, so at this age, I was still breastfeeding quite a bit. He still fed in the middle of the night too (just once- dropped that around 18 months). In the end, I fed him until he was 25 months (but by then it was so not before sleep). I only stopped because he accidentally bit me and it got infected. Anyway, I love reading about the experiences of others and your diary of pregnancy and the early days of Mazen were so useful! Thanks for sharing.
Tracie says
I can relate so much! It’s helpful to hear your experience since my little one turns 9 months tomorrow. I’m so thankful breastfeeding has gone as well as it has so far because it is HARD, but I feel like it’s getting challenging in new ways recently. My son will squirm and wiggle and sometimes I feel like I’m wrestling him to get him to sit still and nurse. You definitely can’t force a baby to eat as much as I might try! I think it’s hard to navigate the transition of how often and now when to nurse with solid foods since he really only starting eating substantial amounts of solids in the last few weeks. I’m thinking maybe I need to cut down on the frequency since his belly is just more full of actual food. I’ve also been wondering if he might self-wean a little earlier than a year, but we’re taking it one day at a time.
Kelli @Hungry Hobby says
Thanks for sharing Kath! This post was actually really helpful because I was thinking that if you nursed it had to be twice a day to keep things going. I didn’t realize you could do only mornings, that’s wonderful news that I’m super excited about it, it feels “doable” haha I’m going to FNCE (leaving the day of his first birthday 🙁 but he won’t remember so I figure it’s okay!) and was planning to do the same, minimal pumping and see what happens. Kal has not been the best nurser but thankfully he has been a wonderful eater so I’m both sad and relieved we are getting close to that one year mark! I honestly think he is ready to wean all but mornings and night, but I keep trying to encourage nursing 1-2 times during the day because I feel like he still needs it. Anyways, thanks for this post!
KathEats says
Sounds like we’re on the same path!
Helen says
Eventually you could try offering solids first, apart from the morning feed. So after his first nap give him lunch then a milk feed after. Then after his second nap your could start seeing if he’s happy with a snack rather than a milk feed. Then give dinner and then a bedtime feed.
Lisa says
I nursed once a day (bedtime) for about 6 months. I still produced milk. All bodies are different though.
K says
I’ve been nursing for so long (I’ve either been nursing or pregnant (or both) since my oldest was born in October 2012) that I’m really not sure what life will look like without a baby or child at the breast! Baby #3 is almost seventeen months and still feeding every 2-3 hours but I still love it ?
Polly says
Ah! This was me as well. I had four kids in six and a half years (1992-1999) and nursed the youngest for a long time, so I was pregnant and/or nursing without a single break for like 11 years! And not to sound like martyr. I was a SAHM who did light freelance writing and dressmaking on the side, and I was always able to make time to go running, and take my kids to activities or the library, etc and we couldn’t afford a babysitter. It was a sweet phase of life.
Aimee says
Weird question: do you think breastfeeding can be almost..addicting?! My daughter (now 4) stopped nursing abruptly when she was two days shy of a year due to HFM 🙁 I am still not over it lol I wanted her to nurse so badly but she wouldn’t. You’re so right- that oxytocin IS STRONG!
KathEats says
Yes! I think the hormones are in place to make it such so we keep doing it : )
Hayley says
I realize typing this (saying it out loud?) will make me out to be a bit strange but I’m still nursing my almost 3.5 year old! We lay in bed together just before bedtime and it’s the sweetest part of my day. It’s over in 2 minutes but that warm snuggle and bonding time is so lovely. So I truly think it can be addicting in a way. I never intended to go this long but he never had a desire to stop and I’ve been happy with it too. I’ve told myself to stop before he turns 4 though!