I am brain dumping on the topic of choices today.
I have come to realize how much I like thinking, planning, and talking about life. And the millions of choices, big and small, we all get to make each day.
There is no class in school about being a human, being an adult, or about living life. We are a diverse planet and one size would not fit all. Life is chaotic and different for every person, yet my brain seeks order and rules. I have always been drawn to systems, and as I wander through the internet I am seeking guidelines, tricks, hacks, and recommendations that I can apply to my own life.
I love reading healthy living blogs because they are filled with great ideas for nutritious food and recommendations for an active life that I can apply to my own.
I follow home, lifestyle, organizing, and minimalism blogs and magazines (and listen to podcasts!) because I am always reflecting how best to live in my own space.
I am obsessed with the Dave Ramsey Show podcast because I love hearing about how other people manage (or mismanage) their money and Dave’s advice for them. His tagline, “a show about your life and your money,” says it all.
Learning how other people do life allows me to reflect, consider, and apply things to my own.
A famous wizard once stated the following to a young hobbit:
I have always been interested in human psychology, and I think it’s fascinating to study the reasons why we make the decisions we do.
Why do we order the fish and chips over the kale caesar?
How do we choose what color to paint our walls or which rug to buy?
What makes us justify purchasing a new iPad or socking away 25% to retirement?
Often it is our choices that set us up for success or failure. And it’s usually not one giant decision but a million tiny choices that push us in one direction or another. Even when you are faced with tragedy, you get to choose which path you will follow in the days and weeks after.
When it comes to how we eat, we live, we dress, we schedule, we work, we love, we manage our money, most of them are the result of a cumulative effect – a snowball effect. Are the choices you are making right this moment moving you towards your overall life goals? Do you prefer a two-steps-forward-one-step-back approach or do you wait until you are sure of your direction and run?
Shana says
So much of this post resonates with me: the love of thinking, planning, organizing, strategizing, the psychology of making choices, the need for systems and order. Most recently, I’ve been trying to pay attention to the motivations for my choices. Are they coming from social pressure, societal standards, social media? I’m really trying to tune in to my own true likes and dislikes and make choices that are in line with my values vs. something I’ve been conditioned to want or need. It’s not to say I’m bucking all cultural norms but more that I’m trying to be aware of things that are imposed on me vs. my own wants. Great topic today. Lots to think about!
KathEats says
Sounds like we think the same!!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
Loved this post! I definitely prefer to wait until I’m sure and then run when I make my decisions. I don’t think it’s a good thing, though… because when will I ever be sure, honestly? I feel like I never dare to take the first step! 🙁
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
Katie D. says
I love the thought process behind decisions too and often spent chunks of time trying to decipher people’s decisions!
Personally, I’ve lost (and maintained) 50lbs on weight watchers. For me so much was changing how I think and as a result, I naturally changed what/how much I ate. Instead of eating to feel full, I eat until I am no longer hungry. Instead of celebrating everything with a treat, I save them for truly special occasions. I’ve learned to show my family love in ways other than baking. I am still a work in progress but even when I pick less healthy meal options, I’m eating less and savoring more – something that works well for maximizing pleasure 🙂
Tonya says
“What are some of the choices you made today and how are they getting you to where you want to go?”
I like this question because last night, I used my time to prep for things I wanted to accomplish today/this week. So when I woke up today, instead of feeling overwhelmed and far away from my what I wanted to achieve, I was excited because I didn’t have to start at zero! So one of my goals was ready to execute and there are only a couple of tiny steps left for the other one!
KathEats says
Bravo!
Alana says
My husband and I used Dave Ramsey’s snowball approach to paying down debt and it worked great for us. We payed off my student loan and two car loans within three years. We didn’t know it at the time but it ultimately put us in the position to sell our house, quit our jobs and travel the world for two years. We never would have considered it if we still had the debt. It really is all about what’s important to you and the choices you make to reflect those feelings.
KathEats says
Congrats!! I listen to Dave’s podcast nearly daily and find all of the debt free screams so inspiring.
Kelly says
Kath, what a great post! SO inspriing! I want to hear more. Can you share your life goals with us, and talk about how your daily choices are moving you in their direction? I totally struggle with goal setting and once I get comfy I get lazy too. ¯\_(?)_/¯ I admire your attitude that every day we get to choose who we want to be!
Kelly says
Oh no, emoji fail!! He was supposed to be shrugging guy.
Megan B. says
Have you read or do you follow Gretchen Rubin? I think you would like her book, Better than Before. It’s all about different personality types and habit formation and how some strategies work for some folks but not others based on their natural tendencies. It’s fascinating! And incredibly helpful to understanding your own choices.
KathEats says
I love her but haven’t actually read any of her books! That book sounds totally up my alley
Blair says
LOve this. I’m constantly trolling the internet’s for ideas on how to live a stress free wanderers lifestyle. Not there yet but getting closer. I try to live life so I won’t have any regrets, so far I’m succeeding in this method of decision making:) I’m always so curious what steers someone to make huge life changes – divorce, complete change of career, leaving a family with children behind. Also while I didnt change personality wise I did change my thinking after having multiples children. Now I have to take their goals and we’ll being into account. Sometimes their well being trumps my adventurousness, not often but occasionally.
Ali says
Currently following Dave’s program and listen to him in the car in the evening… So fun to hear some of the stories, but others its like, you make 3x us, of course you should be able to pay off your 20k debt in 20 months. Planning to become a SAHM after all our debt is taken care of by Christmas 2019!
KathEats says
Yes, but sometimes the bigger the income the bigger the debt. I just listened to one where the couple paid off $1,000,000!! They had a nice income, but that is a huuuuge hole! But either way – everyone is very inspiring!
marie says
Also obsessed with Ramsey podcasts. We took FPU last year and it changed our lives, in the best possible way. It has spilled over into all areas of our life. Intentionality is the key to success – which reminds me of your earlier blog topics and lifestyle choices.
Erika says
Boy, this topic has been on my mind a lot lately. I am back on the weight loss bandwagon again (I went from 220 to 160, TWICE, once in 2010 and then again in 2015 after giving birth to my now 4-year-old) but I am still about 10 pounds away from where I really want to be. Why can’t I get there? Why do I keep making choices that sabotage my goal? It’s because I use food as an emotional salve. And no matter how many books I read (Genene Roth, I love you!) or podcasts I listen to, or friends I talk to…I can’t get myself there mentally. I can’t put in the 3ish months of eating at a calorie deficit to get there, so every year since 2015 I have made the same promise to myself and I can’t follow through. I have been really frustrated and disappointed with myself lately. And yes I’ve tried to give myself grace, but I just need to do the d*** thing 🙂
Erika says
Oh and by “can’t” I mean “I have not been”. Nothing at all is preventing me from eating less other than my lack of will power 🙂
KathEats says
Great realizations! Your comment sounds a lot like where I was last year. I was living life to the fullest and also knew I might have a pregnancy in my future, so did I want to put in the hard work to shed 5-10 vanity pounds? I decided to postpone that work on the other side of hypothetical-turned-real pregnancy. I think it’s also important to recognize that if you can maintain at that weight, maybe that IS your happy weight, and that emotional happiness is more important than having the flattest stomach you can. That was part of the acceptance I had. I would rather have a glass of wine most days of the week than look |this much| better in my bathing suit. Ya know?
Leah says
I love your thought process on this. I’m about 5 lbs heavier than I would like to be at 16 months post partum and some days I really want to get there before I think about baby #2 and other days I think, eh, I’ll worry about it later.
Pauline says
Erika, have you listened to the Podcast “Brain over Binge”? It is a great Podcast which healed my emotional overeating. It has an unussual Approach (no calorie counting!) and changed the way I think about food as emotional salve. It took me 3 months to listen to all the episodes (I had to take breaks in between, because although not long (about 20 minutes per episode) they are quite intense) but now I’m done and very happy and full of relief. I highly recommend it!
Linda @ the Fitty says
It’s my choice to be a victim of my circumstances and I won’t have it any more! I get to decide on what makes me feel inferior.
Abby says
My family made the choice to move to Mexico last July. Our girls 7 and 5 are growing in ways I never imagined. My husband and I are growing in our jobs as administrators at the school we work at. We travel and have discovered so many gems in this beautiful country. I am so glad we made this choice.
Liz says
This is such a timely topic for me. I placed an ad on care.com today to find childcare for my 1-year-old on the days that my 3-year-old will be going to preschool starting this summer. This has been hanging over my head for months, as having to sift through resumes and interview childcare providers seems SO daunting to me. Plus I am full of nerves wondering how my kids are going to react to being in childcare all day 3 days/week when they have so far been home with me full time. But, I KNOW that deep down I am not meant to be a full time sahm and I have a really wonderful part time job opportunity. I am forging ahead knowing that the transition period might be difficult but that ultimately I will be a happier and more balanced mom for my kids on the other side.
Anika Yael Natori, aka, The Josie Girl says
I love the Oprah quote! I’ve been obsessed with her Super Soul Sunday Podcast. You should check it out: http://josiegirlblog.com/2018/01/15/currently-loving-january-2018/#more-23212